6 Ways to Rediscover Yourself After Motherhood

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Few people go into parenthood prepare for the level of overwhelm they’ll experience. Don’t get me wrong, being a parent is amazing. It’s a unique experience that takes you to the heights and depths of life like nothing else.

But most of us go into motherhood (and fatherhood) with romanticized ideas on how it will be when we meet our new little person for the first time, how we’ll show them the wonder of the world, and experience life together in all its joy.

Then reality hits and we discover just how much poop, screaming, crying, yelling, and lack of sleep is actually involved with being a parent.

And it can blindside us like a fly on a windshield. 

In 2015, I found myself kind of floundering in motherhood. I had a 5-year-old son with special needs and a 2-year-old son who had, well, the energy of a 2-year-old.

And I was TIRED. Like, all the time.

My entire world was wrapped around these two little people. All my love, all my time, all my thoughts — they were all for them.

It was a beautiful time, and I was so blessed to be home and enjoy them when I knew so many others didn’t have that opportunity. But the truth is, I was burnt out.

All I knew was how everyone gushed over how wonderful being a parent was. But NO ONE really prepared me for the difficulty of raising a special needs son, nor just how deep you can bury yourself into motherhood.

And boy was I buried.

I was so buried that I didn’t know myself outside of motherhood anymore. Who was I? And was it okay that I felt like there had to be more than meltdowns, poop, exhaustion, and occupational therapy appointments?

At the time, I didn’t think so. I thought that my life was summed up in all the things I was as a mom.

It wasn’t until I realized that God really did make me a multi-faceted being that I discovered just how much I was burying deep inside.

I was made for more.

I wasn’t just made to be a mom. I was also a wife. I was also a sister, a friend, a daughter, and — come to find out — an entrepreneur.

I had gifts and talents that I had buried, along with all the things that made me the unique character I was always meant to be.

I’m funny. I’m a little eccentric and kind of awkward. I’m techy. I’m nerdy. I’m a learner. I’m a money-maker. I’m an ENFJ. And yes, I’m a mom, too — and so much more.

ALL of this — every aspect of my character — is an important part of who I am as a whole. And to deny one part is to cut off an essential part of who I am and keeping it from nurturing the other parts.

Friend, YOU are more than you think you are.

You are many wonderful things all wrapped up into one amazing package. And each part of you, when allowed to shine, benefits all of the others.

So if you’re feeling even a little bit the way I was in 2015, I encourage you to take some time and rediscover all of the buried treasure lying within yourself.

Not sure how? Here are some suggestions:

  • Pick up an old hobby you used to LOVE. Rekindling that excitement can do wonders for your creativity!
  • Find movement you enjoy and re-invent fitness for yourself.Maybe try something new, like rock climbing, krav maga (love it!!), yoga, swimming, etc.
  • Listen to speakers who pull the best out of you! I LOVE Lisa Nichols.
  • Learn something NEW. This has been SO fulfilling for me! I love learning new things, especially new skills to help me exercise the money-maker I’ve had buried inside me for so long! This has been the single most helpful way I’ve found to unearth my buried treasure — treasure I never knew was there!
  • Use your gifts to help someone. There are fewer things more satisfying than helping someone who needs it. And it’s SO exciting when you uncover gifts you didn’t even know you had by using what you already have to help someone else.
  • Talk to a friend. Connecting with someone who is an encourager in your life and who can see the qualities you can’t see in yourself can be an amazing, freeing catalyst for change. SO much change starts with a simple, intimate conversation. Don’t take those for granted!

You’re a treasure, friend. I just know there’s SO much inside of you just waiting to make its way to the surface!

I can’t wait to hear all about the treasure you find when you give yourself room to grow into all you’re meant to be.

Leave a comment below and share the next step you’ll take to find the treasure you’ve been burying! I’d love to encourage you!

Here’s to being a treasure hunter!

2 thoughts on “6 Ways to Rediscover Yourself After Motherhood

  1. Dear Katie,
    I’m at a different point in my life as a mom: my nest is empty and I feel very lost. I remember the shock and exhaustion of early motherhood. I promise you’ll make it through! I love your suggestions and I would add that finding yourself after becoming a mom (and being true to yourself as the years go by) is even more important as the children grow older and eventually become adults and move away. If your entire identity is wrapped up in motherhood, it will probably be an even bigger shock than if you had been true to yourself (like with a hobby, friends, Bible studies, church, etc.). Just sharin’ the love!! Lisa

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